That night

I love you ever since
i’ll seal it someday with a kiss
this day until endless tomorrow
i’ll be with you even in your sorrow

i’m awake that time
you’ll never knew
i’m nervous in our moment
but it stop, you give me clue

the way you kisses my nape
shows my weakness
in your arms, i can’t escape
its okay, today i’m selfless

Torpe.

Laman ng isip, Pintig ng puso
Bakit kailangan ko pang itago?
Pagsikip ng dibdib, pagluha ng mata
Lungkot at paghikbi, pag may kasamang iba

Bakit di ko masabi ng harapan
Kung ano ang tunay na maramdaman?

Kay tamis nang yong ngiti, paniningkit ng yong mata
Bakit iba pa ang may kayang ika’y mapasaya?
Masakit sa ulo, para isipin
Kailan ba magiging sapat, anong gagawin?

Sanay sintamis ng iyong ngiti
Ang yong nadarama sa akin
At ang mala-rosas mong pisngi
Ang sa aki’y makakapagpaamin

Pwede pa ba ako maging sya?
O ang ngiti mo na sa mata ang nakapagpasya?

Hindi ko maamin
Sana’y maramdaman mo
Maraming gustong sabihin
Laman ng isip, puso ko

Hanggang kailan pa ba ako magpapanggap?
Ang oras ay kailan ba magiging karapat-dapat?

Iba na.

(Spoken Word Poetry)
Iba na.
Iba na yung dati.
Naiba na ng ngayon. Nabago na ng PANAHON.

Hindi mawari, ano ba ang nagawa
Ano ang nangyari, bakit nagiba na.
Sa dating sariwang simoy ng hangin
na sinasabayan ng paru-paro
ay nawala na’t kasabay ng pagkakulong nito,
pagkakulong at nalayo na sa sariwang hangin na ninanais nito.

Tulad, ng pagkalayo mo’t pagkamuhi mo sakin
Gawa ng panahon. Gawa ng pagbabago. Gawa ng pagbabago Mo.

Ang dating ngiti sa ‘yong mata
Na ako sayo ang nagdadala
Napalitan na ng galak
Na ang nagdala sa ‘yo ay iba at sa iba.

Sa ibang lugar kung saan di na kita maabot, makausap, malapitan, mahagkan, at mahawakan.
Mahawakan ng mahigpit. Hindi na makapitan sa layo. Sa layo ng narating mo.

Babalikan mo pa ba ako?
Kahit ako’y nasama na sa nakaraan mo?
Nakaraang nilayuan mo.
Dahil sa pagbabago mo.

Blooming Light

I’m So confused
We can express ourselves and comply
Even we’re jealous
We don’t need to deny

I don’t think that the feeling is mutual
Or is it just me, In denial?

I don’t know how to say these
Chills in my face and my crumbling knees
In front of you, confessing
a precious brittle gems

Is the feelings are already the same?
Or will I regret if the time already came?

I’ve been lost, and found by a light
Awaken from my darkest night
Didn’t notice, the light that I follow
turns me into star, shining bright

Is it just a gratitude?
or a love sprung that I can conclude?

You’ve transfer a dying plant
From a desert to a land
Where butterflies lived in
and touches my heart

Will I let me fall for you?
Or I’ll just wait the universe to give me clue?

Will I let myself to give in?
Or stop what have just began.

If I thought

If I thought for just one moment that this would be my last breath,
I’d tell you I’ll love you forever, even beyond death.
If I thought for just one moment that your face would be the last I’d see,
I’d take a million pictures and save them just for me.
If I thought for just one moment that your voice would be the last I’d hear,
I’d listen attentively and promise not to shed a tear.
If I thought for just one moment that your touch would be the last I’d feel,
I’d embrace you and know that this has all been real.
If I thought for just one moment that my heart would beat its last beat,
I’d thank the Lord for allowing us to meet.

(c)Dana Schwartz

I’m Hiding- Deep Inside

Can no one see this smile I’m faking,
See how, inside, I’m constantly shaking?
These people all claim they know me well,
Yet no one can see through my crumbling shell?

“I’m fine”, I whisper, my sadness unknown,
They leave me to deal with this anguish alone.
I’ve hidden behind this wall most of my life,
I’ve managed so far, I’ve dealt with my strife.

Watching as, slowly, my blood leaks away,
It helps to keep life’s true horrors at bay.
I pull down my sleeve to cover my hurt,
For approaching footsteps, I’m on the alert.

I guess my pretense is just all too real,
No one has to know of the pain that I feel.
The real me inside, where no one can see,
I can fool everyone else, why can’t I fool me?

© Rachel Zalakos

Replaced

I feel like i’ve been replaced
no spot left for me
he says his love is true
but no, that can not be..

it’s never us anymore
he’s always gotta be here
i tell him that it’s fine,
but god, no i won’t shed a tear

i want nothing but for him to be happy,
even if it makes me sad
i would do anything for him
just so he doesn’t get mad

my mind says i go over board
but i would give him the whole world
if only i had the courage
to open up and say a few words

i know he’s my ****friend
and i used to be his
i feel she’s now taking my place
but that’s just how it is

im tired of secretly crying
tired of hiding these fcking tears
but since love him so much
god i would hide these for years

i just want him to be happy
even if it means i have to go
i guess im being replaced
its that much more i dont wanna know

I Wish I Was Her

I wish I was her
The girl you’ve dreaming about
To think how desperate I can be
To replace that girl in your heart.

I wish I was her
The apple of your eye that you’re thinking
You’ve been telling that to our friends
Didn’t know, I’m secretly hurting.

I wish I was her
The girl right next to your heart
Even though I know that I cannot
be the girl you always think at night.